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Monday, March 28, 2011 | 7:40 PM

I wanted to know your answer and reaction, indeed. I thought i could take in any bad comments. And i was prepared for any. When i heard that your reaction was : " You want arh? Take loh. ", i didn't know what to say. Speechless was all i had as a reaction. Initially, i was able to take it. But after the more i think about it, i felt more and more heartache. You have no idea how much pain i felt.. Guess it's because i had too much expectation from you. Yunkai didn't even want to tell me how you reacted, he didn't want to say the truth. He said you didn't say anything. But when i ask RongFong, he said you responded : " You want arh? Take loh. ". I know well that how your reaction would be, I expected your reaction to be as what RongFong had said too. I really expected for it. No, it's more like a predictable answer. But i guess no matter how much i expect the answer would be or no matter how ad i expect the answer to be, i'll still be equally heart broken, isn't it? But what can i do? The only thing i can do is accept it right? But then today i had lunch with Liyang. In the cab, Liyang told me about somethings about you. Things that i expect it'll be too. Things that you don't like about me : 1. You don't like me talking in the somehow ahlian way when i talk to Peiyu. 2. You don't like me being too open. Just like that time i keep saying by your ears that you don't dare and i dare. But have you thought of the reasons i being this way? Talking like some ahlian to Peiyu. That, i have no excuse at all. Cause that's how i talk to Peiyu. As for open, if i'm not open and initiative, would you? Liyang told me : " Since there's only these 2 things he don't like, then change lahs. Then can already one ". Liyang korkor arh, you don't know me well yet. I don't change for people. But for once, i thought to myself : " So should i change? For him. " . For once, thinking to change for someone, came into my mind.. I was actually all happy when Liyang said jokingly about somethings like Liayng and me is together or something or whatever ( i kinda forgot ) and your reaction is somehow sad. That's what Liyang told me. Should i take it? Two reactions : one bad and one good for me. And yes, the bad one affected me more. I felt like crying. I really did. But i didn't. I didn't want to. In any case, i'm unable to cry too. Cause, my heart is crying already. You got no idea how hurt it is, isn't it?

F0r the last time, MH, i don't like you. You're making me despise you. I'm near to i don't ever wanna hear anything bout you anymore. I don't like you, confirm guarantee chop chop. I only treat you as a goof friend that i can talk to and a guy who i can treat as a older brother. That's all. NOTHING MORE. AND NEVER EVER WILL. Get it? You're a nice guy, just that you might WORLD alot. Other than that, you're a good guy. Please! Of all the girls why me?! I mean okay, face the fact. I can't stop you from liking me, FACT. But if you declare it in front of everybody moreover infont of yehong. HELLO?! ARE YOU MAD?! YOU'RE INSANE! THERE ISN'T A NEED FOR THAT ANYWAY! You want disturb me then disturb me. Don't go disturb yunkai they all. But at the least, through you, i know the reaction of yehong.. STILL! THERE ISN'T A NEED TO DO THAT INFONT OF HIM AND EVERYBODY! Mr ting, what can i do then you'll stop all these? Stop alright? You're making me tired. You didn't contact me for quite a number of days. And i thought you've given up. And now i hear all this nonsense?! Seriously, treat me as a friend or meimei. Enough already. Even if i being forced to be with you or something, you won't get a good life. TOLONG! You don't like me~ You no like me~ No you don't~ -.- The guy, the person, the only one, that i like, is your friend. Don't you get it. i told you so many times he's the only one that i like. Even if you're better than him, even if you'll treat me like some princess and pamper me like a queen, i still won't fall for you. I won't be with you! I won't be the one taking care of you. No i won't! So stop, alright? I like yehong. That's enough. More than enough. I don't care if you're better than him or will treat me better than me. I don't care! I don't give a damn! I like him! Only him! So, yahs, get it?! This is my most simple english already. Don't make me say it infront of your face and everybody. It's heartless, i don't want to do it too. So don't make me. Seriously, i will if you continue doing the same stupid stuff. No matter how cold or how bad or whatever negative stuffs i get from yehong, i still like him. And that's that. I've enough heartaches and headaches. If you really like me not for the sake of having a feeling that you've lose, then do me a favour, don't add on any problems to me. Thankyou.